July 28, 2017

do one thing each day that scares you.

Justin and I were watching Naruto last night and I got inspired by one of Shikamaru's wartime pep talks. I tweeted out, "Write the pep talk that you need to hear." And then proceeded to get engrossed in battle scenes and flashbacks and the ever-present conflict of peace vs. suffering, light vs. dark. 

I woke up this morning in a mood. I was excited to get out of bed right away and drink coffee, but when I actually got up and started thinking about my day, the anxiety beast ensnared my heart. I wrote in my journal. I took my usual morning walk around the yard. I called Justin's dentist about possible dry socket. I went to the grocery store and my heart pounded as I needed to tell the clerk that I needed to put stuff back because I didn't have enough money on me. 

I did things that scare me today and I haven't even gone to work yet. That has to count for something. 

I'm learning that these small moments of courage really add up. 

One step at a time, looking fear in the eyes is getting less scary. One step at a time, telling it to back the hell off is getting less scary. One step at a time, my willpower to say "yes" to the fun stuff is growing stronger again. 

Do one thing that scares you today. 

And then go buy ice cream for a reward! ;)

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