December 31, 2019

2019: a year in review


JANUARY 2019

This year started off with a sense of freedom in that I no longer had a two foot long IV coming out of my arm. I was still in the beginning stages of my recovery from blastomycosis that started with choking down little pink and blue pills twice a day, plus a lab poke every three weeks. The silver lining was getting up at the butt crack of dawn and getting to see some sunrise magic in the sky... plus treating myself to McDonald's breakfast after getting poked in the arm. ;) I dyed my hair and got new glasses because I was in crisis mode and didn't feel like myself in my own body anymore. I chose "MOVE" as my One Little Word for the year and started every morning with a Thirty-Second Dance Party for good measure. I did a giveaway for a free wedding album to try and get more eyes on my business, but all it really did was get me a lot of likes on an IG post. You win some, you lose some I guess! Noelle and Josh found out they were having another baby boy so I got to work on a sweet baby blanket for them as a baby shower present.


FEBRUARY 2019

It snowed. And snowed and snowed and snowed some more. I vowed on Instagram to go out and play in the snow, and of course I had to make good on my promise. I've always been a sucker for snowflakes in my hair. It reminds me of being little and feeling the magic that comes every time it snows. Everything gets quiet and all you can hear is your breathing and the crunch of snow beneath your feet and it's almost like getting lost inside of your own little world for a moment. And what a sweet moment it was. I did a giveaway for a free session on Facebook so I would be excited about taking pictures again during the dead of winter, and I was literally counting down the days until Spring and busy season would be in full swing again.


MARCH 2019

I drank a lot of coffee. I watched a lot of TV. I anxiously counted down the days until April, when wedding season started and I had my first check up with my pulmonologist in Weston. Trying to schedule my appointment and CT scan was a nightmare and also the reason I had like six different numbers for these people in my phone. Every time I called, I was told "Someone will call you back to schedule" and nobody ever did. I learned to be a little bit aggressive after I got frustrated enough to deal with these people. I colored a lot to try and tame my anxiety and calm the rage. Grey's Anatomy broke me and I started watching America's Next Top Model for something to take my mind off of everything. I had a session with Starr and her pup David at the end of the month and took Abby's prom pictures shortly after.


APRIL 2019

April felt like a new beginning. I got that itch for change again and ten days before my birthday found myself at the hair salon making a considerable chop to my hair for a new year. Busy season started and all of a sudden that rush that only comes from doing what you love filled my heart in the very best of ways. I shot my first wedding of the year on April 6 and from there it was maternity pictures and birthday celebrations and an ER visit for blasto pain, plus my first CT and check up with my pulmonologist since being discharged from the hospital last December. The mass that was in my lung was completely gone, but my CT showed a little pocket of fluid around my lung still. My doctor reassured me that my medication would resolve it. I set a goal to break out my big camera and turn it on myself once a month for my Currently posts. I found my footing again in this whole "working for myself" gig and just felt so grateful for this little life I have built for myself.


MAY 2019

May started with a day trip to Burlington to celebrate my best friend in the whole entire world and baby Ollie at her baby shower. I got to spend quality time with some of the people I love most, and set up a few sessions for my next trip to Burlington at the end of the month. The weekend after Noelle's baby shower was my second annual Spring Portrait Day event with Next Stop Kids Shop. The grove of cherry blossom trees I always stalk like a mad woman this time of year finally bloomed after Mother's Day and I ran around in the magic with my tripod for some self-portrait therapy. I spent Memorial Day Weekend in Burlington, avoiding Chocolate Fest like the plague. The real reason for me making a trip home was to photograph baby Oliver's newborn photos, and I did two more family sessions as well. May was so full of love and light and good things.


JUNE 2019

I got my first photography referral from Instagram! This was a pretty big deal for me after investing in Jenna Kutcher's Instagram Lab course last year. I went to Oshkosh for an engagement session and got caught in a freak rainstorm on my way back to Waupaca. Work-wise, I also photographed Abby's senior pictures and had my annual session with the Lasky's to document Emmet's birthday photos. I celebrated one full year of working for myself. We bought a tiny grill to use on the deck, which also meant Justin was grilling in the mornings before his parents got home from work, haha. I made another trip to the ER for pain that just turned out to be my blastomycosis. I booked my first 2020 wedding! And celebrated summer with microwave s'mores.


JULY 2019

I tried to make my IG feed more cohesive, sticking to a color scheme of mostly blue, green, yellow, and brown. That pretty much went out the window after a couple of weeks, but it was nice to try it for a little while haha. I shared my first wedding of the year over on my other blog and it actually became my most viewed post of 2019! I'm always shocked when stuff like that happens, for whatever reason. I photographed an extended family session at Brainard's at the beginning of the month, and started planning a Burlington trip for my favorite thing: sunflower season. I embraced no makeup days, messy hair, and nervous means do it. We had a freak thunderstorm/tornado that knocked out our power for an entire Saturday. My trip to Burlington also included breakfast with my aunt and uncle, best friend time, and a trip to East Troy and Elkhorn to hang out with Bryce... honestly, all the things the best weekends are made of.


AUGUST 2019

I started August with probably my best impulse purchase all year... a set of tiny hands that I pull out during photoshoots haha! I met up with one of my Instagram friends in real life and we made coffee dates a regular thing now! I had the honor of photographing a 50th anniversary party and four generations of one of the sweetest families. August is always hard for me because of the anniversary of my dad's death falling right in the middle of it. I planned Burlington trips and fun stuff like a trip to the county fair in between the death anniversary and doctor's appointments and CT scans and lab pokes. Honestly, this is the year I got used to having my blood taken on a regular basis and didn't freak out at the doctor anymore. Hit up the fair with Abby, per tradition, and we walked around taking pictures and drinking lemonade. I had a family session with big kids after the fair and it was so much fun! Rounded out August with another trip to Burlington so I could photograph a vow renewal on Lake Geneva over Labor Day Weekend, and it really was the sweetest way to end summer.


SEPTEMBER 2019

September was all about engagement sessions! And planning the craziness that October always brings with it. I was so excited to break out my fall wardrobe and open the books for Fall Mini Sessions in October. (Did I mention October was going to be crazy?) We celebrated my nephew starting 4K, his first year of school. This girl had a dentist appointment and treated herself to coffee afterward. I celebrated that the leaves were starting to change... but also refused to stop wearing sandals until it was actually cold enough to wear socks. I booked up my Burlington mini sessions and my mind was BLOWN. Sometimes I still can't believe that this is my life. I had an engagement session at the Green Bay Botanical Gardens and 10/10, would absolutely shoot there again. I also did an engagement session at Brainard's right as the leaves started changing and it was magical. I celebrated hitting my personal wedding booking goal for 2020! ...By treating myself to a Rachel Allene mug and sweatshirt. (I. Love. Her. Stuff. Ok.) While I was at Walgreens waiting for my blasto meds to be refilled, something sparked a moment of bravery in me. I decided it was finally time to do the thing I had been dreaming about for the last five years: go back to therapy. I got a recommendation from my primary doctor and made an appointment for October.


OCTOBER 2019

October... Crazy, crazy month. Justin and I celebrated his birthday by taking a little vacation to Appleton. We tried king crab for the first time after binge-watching six seasons of Deadliest Catch. Verdict: It was pretty good. After we came home from Justin's birthday celebrations, I was off and running, diving head first into busy season. Mini sessions and engagement sessions and a wedding consult, oh my. Plus, the very thing I love getting every year (without fail) to round out busy season... A cold! That turned into bronchitis! That turned into me rushing to my doctor two days before my last wedding of 2019 to give me anything that wouldn't leave me a hacking mess during their ceremony. One nebulizer treatment plus a prescription for an inhaler later, I loaded up on DayQuil and Mucinex and headed to Burlington before road tripping to Chicago with my mom to see my middle school best friend get married. We stayed in one of the oldest homes in Lincoln Park and checked out our AirBnB owner's pizza place. Brittany's wedding was beautiful and the best way to round out busy season.


NOVEMBER 2019

November felt like renewal. I celebrated my OG 365 project from 2010 by going out and taking self-portraits on the anniversary of day 365. I confronted some big things in therapy and that felt like a big step in and of itself. I thought November was gonna be a nice change of pace from October and then I blinked and had sessions almost every weekend PLUS a major holiday to celebrate. Something felt different about my sessions this month... I felt like I was in my element again. For the first time since I moved away from Burlington and away from all my friends and willing models, I was still just doing my thing and took a moment after an engagement session to sit in my car and celebrate that feeling. To counteract that, and Mercury in retrograde always has to screw something up, I found out that I no longer had a pulmonologist! My primary doc set me up with a new one and my appointment with him brought the best news: this girl is OFFICIALLY BLASTO FREE! (*cue all the party popper emojis!*)


DECEMBER 2019

December has been a whirlwind. One year ago, I was laying in a hospital bed literally dreaming of everything that's happened this year. Sometimes I still have to pinch myself to really believe that this is my life now and I'm not dreaming. December has been a lot of putting my head down and working on a business plan for next year... I have some lofty goals to reach and I think I have a plan (somewhat) on how to obtain and reach those goals. I did a lot of work in therapy this month... A lot of taking notes and repeating to myself, "Asking for the things you want does not make you selfish." Other than that, I can 100% say that I still hate wrapping Christmas presents, and Christmas lights bring me so much joy this time of year.

2019, you have absolutely been a dream come true for me. 2020, show us what you got!

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